Food

I've had some recent experiences with food, and I'd like to share them with you.

Grab a log and toast a marshy.

Last night I was busy filming shows, and I missed dinner. Even worse, I had not had lunch because I was busy learning about verbs.

I remembered the stash of Cup O' Noodles I had under my bed. I tend to use these rations as a last resort. I discovered that when I eat them before I go to bed, I wake up with a cranium crunching, MSG hang over.

I do not have a microwave.

I thought to myself. There it was. My cup-at-a-time coffee maker, perfect for a Cup O' Noodles.

As I found out the hard way, I put too much water in. I reached under the boiling drip and scalded the "jesus, mary and josephhhhh fu*k me that burns" out of my hand.

Well now boiling water is dripping everywhere, so I sloppily set the Cup O' Noodles on my desk, where it teetered for a moment, and spilled partially on my laptop.

I managed to get a cup under the drip, and I caught my fish flipping me the bird. Well you know what? He's not getting fed anymore. Ungrateful son of a pet store.

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In the end, the situation worked out fantasticly. Everytime I boot up my computer, I'm treated to the smell of warm noodles simmering in chicken broth. And now I don't have to spend thousands on gourmet food for an aquatic whore.